After the burial, the wife went straight to the local bar and began to party as if there was no tomorrow. The gaiety of her actions were becoming extreme while her neighbors approached in a group to ask these questions: “Are you not afraid? Concerned?
Worried? …that this man who practiced black magic and stated when he died he would dig his way up and out of the grave to come back and haunt you for the rest of your life?”
The wife put down her drink and said…”Let the old bastard dig. I had him buried upside down.”
An older couple were lying in bed one night.
She said, “You used to hold my hand when we were courting.”
Wearily he reached across, held her hand for a second and tried to get back to sleep. A few moments later she said, “Then you used to kiss me.”
Mildly irritated, he reached across, gave her a peck on the cheek and settled down to sleep. Thirty seconds later she said, “Then you used to bite my neck.”
Angrily, he threw back the bed clothes and got out of bed.
Where are you going?” she asked. “To get my teeth!”
As my grandmother and I
were walking towards the United Nations Building in New York City, we came upon a street evangelist who was trying to get the attention of passersby. He urged those near him to flee from the wrath to come.
“I warn you,” he roared, “that there will be weeping, and wailing, and gnashing of teeth!”
An old woman in the crowd shouted snidely: “Sir, I have no teeth!”
“Lady,” the evangelist retorted, “teeth will be provided!”
