A little boy got a 0 on a geography exam.

39

A young woman walks into a prestige car sales room. Looks around at all the Porsches, Lamborghini’s, Jags etc., and says to the salesman. “Can I have the red one?” – a top of the range Porsche.

“I’ll pay cash!” and starts taking handfuls of cash out of a carrier bag until she gets to the right price. The deal is finalised very quickly and the girl drives it away. She is back 2 days later, “I want my money back… it smell awfully bad when I use the brakes,” she states emphatically.

Not wanting to lose the sale (having taken cash and fiddled the books) the manager decides to ride in the car with her… in case she is not driving it properly. He gets in and she roars out of the dealership, drops it into second gear at 55 mph, floors the pedal again and slips into 3rd at 80mph does a handbrake turn into a country lane and then really starts to accelerate. 120mph into 4th gear; 5th at 145mph.

The engine is screaming, trying to leap out of the bonnet when it reaches 170mph. The scenery is a green blur the G-force has him pinned in the seat. In the distance, to his relief, the barriers of a level crossing are beginning to come down and she will have to slow down (he thinks!) instead the pitch of the engine increases.

100 yards from the crossing she slams on the brakes and the car stops inches from the barrier. “Can you smell it?” she says. “SMELL IT?

I’M SITTING IN IT!”

Top Jokes

Forrest Gump was tested at the Gates of Heaven

St. Peter said, “Welcome, Forrest. We’ve heard a lot about you.”He continued, “Unfortunately, it’s getting…

Funny Joke: Two Texans die and end-up in hell

Two Texans die and end-up in hell.Satan decides to pay them a visit, so he…

JOKE OF THE DAY: A 97-year-old woman…

JOKE OF THE DAY: A 97-year-old woman sits down with her attorney to discuss her…

Top Stories