he gurney beside her bed, and began to help the nurses ready her for the trip down to the OR. She was pale.
Small.
Her eyes fluttered open, cloudy but alert. As Thomas leaned in to adjust the straps, the room froze.
Her eyes locked onto him—wide, horrified. Her lips trembled.
Then, as if struck by lightning, she bolted upright and screamed with the terror of a woman who believed her last hour had come:
“God save me!
It’s the butcher!”
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Lisa & Judy were doing some carpenter work on a Habitat for Humanity House. Lisa was nailing down house siding, would reach into her nail pouch, pull out a nail & either toss it over her shoulder or nail it in. Judy, figuring this was worth looking into, asked, ‘ Why are you throwing those nails away?’
Lisa explained, ‘When I pull a nail out of my pouch, about half of them have the head on the wrong end & I throw them away.’
Judy got completely upset & yelled, ‘You moron!
Those nails aren’t defective!
They’re for the other side of the house!’
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A man was telling his co-worker one day that the company was transferring him to Chicago. He explained that he was going to quit before he had to move there.
When asked why, he replied that he was just too afraid of all the crime even though he would be passing up a big salary increase and greater benefits. His co-worker said he should reconsider.
Chicago was a magnificent city, with world class museums, loaded with a great history, sites, good public transportation, etc.
Then he said: “Why I myself worked in Chicago for almost 10 years, and in all that time I never ever had a problem with crime while I was working.”
The first asked “What did you do there?”
To which the other replied, “I was tail-gunner on a bread truck.”
